Love and Respect is Oxygen to a Marriage

Love and Respect. Two words that we often hear when it comes to marriage. Two words that when lived out can breathe life into our marriages and when neglected can breed decay in our marriages. Words are extremely powerful and with them we create the atmosphere of our relationship. Ephesians 5:33 says, “However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” Did you notice the must?

Without love and respect the marriage suffers.

It is crucial that we get good at loving and respecting our spouses. Now the question is, “What does it look like to love my wife or respect my husband and are the two mutually exclusive? Love and respect are simple concepts that we tend to complicate. The best way to know how to love and respect your spouse is to ask them. The answer will be different for most of us but most of us will have an answer. Think about it.

What are some things your spouse could do to make you feel loved? How about respected? And of course love and respect are not mutually exclusive or designated for only one gender. Wives want to be respected and husbands want to be loved as well. Best practice is to create an abundance of both in as many ways as possible as often as possible. 

Here are some ideas to get you started (not to be replaced with an actual conversation to find out how your spouse would feel loved or respected:))

10 ways to love your wife

-Date her; plan date nights, plan for a babysitter if necessary

-Use your words and speak words of adoration over her

-Compliment her physical appearance using specific details

-Make her dinner

-Listen with attentiveness; make eye contact, ask questions, VALIDATE

-Plan a night out for her and her friends

-Reenact your first date

-Plan a renewal of vows

-Take her shopping and be present with her during the shopping

-Spoil her like you would for an anniversary on a regular day

10 ways to respect your husband

-Use your words to tell him you respect him

-Offer to serve him food at outings

-Receive his influence when he has a strong opinion

-Speak to his potential

-Listen to him by staying engaged in the conversation

-Ask him for an idea

-Ask him for his advice in something and follow it

-Speak positive about him in front of other people

-Give him a compliment that is specific

-Thank him for all he does for you and your family